Best Facebook Status Updates of All Time

Posted on October 9, 2017

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Best Facebook Status Updates Short Messages

Born to express not to impress B
You can never buy love… but still you have to pay for it.
Not always ‘Available’ try your luck!
When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle!… He’s dreaming too 😆
You either live in love or die, there is no way in between!
Only Love takes you to heaven without the dying part.
My ‘last seen at’ was just to check your ‘last seen at’
Failure is not an option — it comes bundled with Windows!
The spaces between your fingers are meant to be filled with mine…
There are three sides to an argument – your side, my side and the right side.
It’s cute when your crush’s crush is you.
When life puts you in tough situations, don’t say, why me? Just say, try me!
I believe there should be a better way to start each day… instead of waking up every morning.
My one hand is enough to fight against the world… If you hold the other one.
I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode 😀
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn’t contain any calories.
I don’t have dirty mind, I have sexy imagination.
The road to success is always under construction.
Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.
The longer the title the less important the job.
Not all men are fools, Some stay bachelor 😉
Parachute for Sale! used once, never opened…
I may not be perfect, but I’m the best you’ll ever have… you’ll realize it the day i stop coming back!
Sometimes you succeed… and other times you learn.
When inspiration doesn’t come to me, I go halfway to meet it.
The richer you get, the more expensive happiness becomes.
If you don’t succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried.
His story is history, my story is mystery.
Never test how deep the water is with both feet 😆
Phones are better than girlfriends, At least we can switch off!
In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? They both have an iPhone 😆
I’m not online, it’s just an optical illusion.
If you want to make your dreams come true, the first thing you have to do is wake up.
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
Silent people have the loudest minds.
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught. No, I’m not feeling violent, I’m feeling creative with weapons.
If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.
I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!
I will win, not immediately but definitely.
I am single because god is busy writing to best love story for me 😆
Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose. The longer the title the less important the job.
Dear Teacher,
I talk to everyone, so moving my seat won’t help.
Sincerely, Student!
The real reason women live longer than men because they don’t have to live with women.
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not 😂
Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal my status :p
People who tolerate me on the daily basis! are real heroes in my eye.
My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right 😀
Style is a reflection of your attitude and personality.
People with high ego and unnecessary attitude deserves the standing ovation of the tallest finger…
I am who i am, you approval is not needed.
Silence is the best answer to a FOOL.
I am multi talented; I can talk and piss you off at the same time.
Always remember you are unique, just like everyone else.
Excellence is not a skill, It is an attitude.
I know I am awesome, so I don’t care about your opinion.
When i was born, i was so surprised, I didn’t talk for a year and half.
People say me bad. But trust me I am the worst!
I don’t care what people think or say about me!
Every people is a intelligent, when he work hard!
If you can’t convince them, confuse them.
Try to solve your problem yourself… Don’t Depend on other!
People are like ‘Music’ some say the ‘Truth’ and rest, just noise…
Best way to deal with haters, Keep calm, and stay classy…
Sometimes you need to maintain a distance to keep them close to you.
Good thing is listening a new song is that it doesn’t remind you of anyone…
I’m cool but Summer made me hot!
I wish I had ‘Google’ in my mind and ‘Antivirus’ in my heart…
I was reminded that my blood type is be Positive.
I am not perfect but I am limited Edition.
What people say to your face is not a problem. The problem is what they say behind your back.
Before you judge me make sure that you’re perfect.
My attitude is based on how you treat me.
If a plan didn’t work, Alphabet has 25 more letters.
I want my Girlfriend like Google, She will understand me better.
My alarm clock is clearly jealous of my amazing relationship with my BED.
I tried being like you, my personality didn’t like it.
I don’t need to explain myself because, I know I’m right.
Work until you don’t have to, introduce yourself.
I am learning from my mistakes! Without mistakes we can’t learn.
My attitude based on how you treat me.
Your looks don’t make you Beautiful; it’s the person inside who makes you beautiful…
Dream’ as if you’ll live forever. Live as if tomorrow is last one…
Life is too short Don’t waste it updating status every hours.
If people are trying to bring you ‘down’ It only means that you are ‘above them’.
There are two type of people winner and Losser, winner always working hard, losser always try to shortcut for win.
Every problem comes with solution, but my GF don’t have.
There comes a point in life, when you realize who really matters, who never did, and who always will…
Someone asked me How is your life? I just smiled and replied, She is fine…
I wish my parents were like Google. They should understand me even before I complete.

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